funny quotes for orkut

Everything has been said before, but since nobody listens we have to keep going back and beginning all over again. ~Andre Gide, Le traite du Narcisse, 1891 Everything I eat has been proved by some doctor or other to be a deadly poison, and everything I don't eat has been proved to be indispensable for life. But I go marching on. ~George Bernard Shaw



Don't knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. ~Kin Hubbard



I have two doctors, my left leg and my right. ~G.M. Trevelyan



Every time we walk along a beach some ancient urge disturbs us so that we find ourselves shedding shoes and garments or scavenging among seaweed and whitened timbers like the homesick refugees of a long war. ~Loren Eiseley



A cross-eyed teacher can keep twice the number of children in order than any other, because the pupils do not know who she's looking at. ~Four Hundred Laughs: Or, Fun Without Vulgarity, compiled and edited by John R. Kemble, 1902



We probably wouldn't worry about what people think of us if we could know how seldom they do. ~Olin Miller



A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. ~Dave Barry, "Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn"



The forceps of our minds are clumsy things and crush the truth a little in the course of taking hold of it. ~H.G. Wells



Constant togetherness is fine - but only for Siamese twins. ~Victoria Billings



Complete possession is proved only by giving. All you are unable to give possesses you. ~Andre Gide



A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both. ~Dwight D. Eisenhower, first inaugural address, 20 January 1953



To take something from a person and keep it for oneself: that is robbery. To take something from one person and then turn it over to another in exchange for as much money as you can get: that is business. Robbery is so much more stupid, since it is satisfied with a single, frequently dangerous profit; whereas in business it can be doubled without danger. ~"The Mission," Chapter 2



I took a deep breath and listened to the old bray of my heart: I am, I am, I am. ~Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar, Chapter 20



When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and exhausting condition continuously until death do them part. ~G.B. Shaw, Getting Married, 1908



Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throats. ~Martin H. Fischer



One must have a good memory to be able to keep the promises that one makes. ~Friedrich Nietzsche



I have found that if you love life, life will love you back. ~Arthur Rubinstein



Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. ~Mark Twain, Following the Equator



The only way to have a life is to commit to it like crazy. ~Angelina Jolie



Gotta use your brain, it's the most important part of your equipment. ~Kevin Andrews and Warren Miller, Extreme Skiing