funny quotes barbie
It's been told that swimming is a wimp sport, but I don't see it. We don't get timeouts, in the middle of a race we can't stop and catch our breath, we can't roll on our stomachs and lie there, and we can't ask for a substitution. ~Dusty Hicks
I roamed the countryside searching for answers to things I did not understand. ~Leonardo da Vinci
If gay and lesbian people are given civil rights, then everyone will want them! ~Author unknown, as seen on a button at evolvefish.com
Were I a philosopher, I should write a philosophy of toys, showing that nothing else in life need to be taken seriously, and that Christmas Day in the company of children is one of the few occasions on which men become entirely alive. ~Robert Lynd
Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished. ~Lao Tzu
What you discover about life's shell game is that it's hardest to follow the pea when you're the pea. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
Your safety gears are between your ears. ~Author Unknown
Wives of ballplayers, when they teach their children their prayers, should instruct them how to say: "God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Babe Ruth. Babe Ruth has upped Daddy's paycheck by fifteen to forty percent." ~Waite Hoyt
What we call progress is the exchange of one nuisance for another nuisance. ~Henry Havelock Ellis
Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy. ~Francois, Duc de La Rochefoucauld
It's hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty. ~George Burns
The coquets of both sexes are self-lovers, and that is a love no other whatever can dispossess. ~John Gay, The Beggar's Opera
An inability to stay quiet is one of the most conspicuous failings of mankind. ~Walter Bagehot
Soup and fish explain half the emotions of human life. ~Sydney Smith
We used to build civilizations. Now we build shopping malls. ~Bill Bryson
Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran
If a horse can't eat it, I don't want to play on it. ~Dick Allen, on artificial turf, 1970
Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, it is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver. ~Jack Handey
Religion is a pill best swallowed without chewing. ~Author Unknown
My mother said it was simple to keep a man, you must be a maid in the living room, a cook in the kitchen and a whore in the bedroom. I said I'd hire the other two and take care of the bedroom bit. ~Jerry Hall
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